Better late than never! Somehow, between my travels and coming up from paper work, the newsletter is complete... it's a long one filled with a lot of important information... so I am going to let you delve right into it... take care....

May your journey be gentle and beautiful!
In Love & Light,
Gail
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UPDATES AT THE SITE

At Empowering Caregivers care-givers.com

Our newly designed caregiving articles database is almost completed. We are still updating the appropriate categories and descriptions for many of the articles but the bulk of the articles are up and you may begin viewing them at: Caregiving Articles. Please bookmark this new link in your resources as the old link will become obsolete with a link forwarding on it.

We are extremely grateful to Ms. Paula Hoare who gave so much time and energy in designing the database. It is definitely much easier to use, more user friendly and it saves is a tremendous amount of time in labor preparing them for the website. Thank you with all my heart Paula.

To submit articles to our database for review at: Submit.

Free Email Accounts At Empowering Caregivers

Sign up for your primary or secondary email account and tell a friend about your free email account at the Empowering Caregivers Site. You can sign up from the main page or click on this link: Free email account

National Organization For Empowering Caregivers NOFEC.org

Invitation To Join NOFEC
Complimentary Membership
For Family / Informal Caregivers

National Organization For Empowering Caregiver's (NOFEC) invites you to sign up as members. If you are a family caregiver membership is complimentary. We invite you to fill in our caregiver survey.. The surveys are strictly confidential. The statistics will be used in our proposals as we apply for grants and funding. To reach the site click on this link: www.nofec.org. or click on Join to sign up.

At NOFEC's site, we have just completed the design and installation of our resource database so you may submit links to organizations, non profits, government links, and educational links. Click on: Submit (Please do not submit commercial links as they will be declined.)

Our events calendar database is also complete so you may list your events at: Events

Mark Kalamar is the creator of both of these databases for NOFEC. His caring and support has just been wonderful and again, we are extremely grateful for his time and energy.

Volunteers

It is a miracle to see how NOFEC has been thriving as a grass roots organization with so many professional volunteers giving of their time. We are truly fortunate and so very grateful.

While many of you are saddled with caring 24/7 several of you have been reaching out to do something that supports you in a totally different way. Volunteering can bring purpose and meaning into your lives while you are at home. It is a way to connect with others and serve on a different level.

We have received many emails from members offering to volunteer.You can volunteer directly at NOFEC or email us at: volunteers@nofec.org. We also have a volunteer form at the site which you may fill in and submit from online.Please tell us a little about yourself : such as what your strengths and interests are; or what your gifts are and how you envision yourself assisting us. Many positions available and they can be performed from your home on your computer. Presently, we are in need of data entry and editors. We also have listings at NOFEC and on several volunteer sites such as Idealist.org, Volunteermatch.org, SeniorService.org and servenet.org. Just search for National Organization For Empowering Caregivers NOFEC and you will find the lists of different volunteer positions we are seeking help with.

Empowering Caregivers Chats Resume onSept 15th

So many of you have checked in at various times while we were not meeting during the summer. I look forward to your participation as we resume our chats once again. Check our schedule at: Schedule

Mary C. Fridley
Questions & Answers
September 2003
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Or click on this link:
Featured Guest Experts
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NEW CAREGIVING ARTICLES AT THE SITE

Learning From Life : Charlie Badenhop, Arati Co.Ltd
Do you ever find yourself thinking, "Life has taught me some tough lessons, and the scars do not heal easily."? This article can help you learn valuable lessons from the past, instead of allowing the past to determine your future.

Sometimes He Sings : Joan Smith
The author shares about her experiences with her husband who has Alzheimer's and when she is most happy.

Conscious Choices For Aging With Grace: Gail Mitchell
Here are ideas on experiencing life more fully and aging with grace, dignity, meaning, & wisdom as life expectancy expands. Among these are how to nurture yourself to better care for your loved one.

Coping Through Exercise: Daniel Kuhn MSW, Mather Institute on Aging
Your own well being is most important when caring for a loved one. It is crucial for you to create some exercise time for yourself against the odds the author discusses.

Good Grief!! Daniel Kuhn MSW, Mather Institute on Aging
Those who care for loved ones with Alzheimer's disease also face a long series of losses as the disease unfolds over many years. Caregivers need to recognize their own grief reactions and learn ways of dealing with the emotional challenges of grieving over many losses.

Succeeding At Caring For A Loved One: Jacqueline Marcell
The author shares successful step in caring for a loved one with Alzheimer's.

It's Hot Outside: Mary C. Fridley RN, BC, Gero-Resources
The importance of hydration and tips for caregivers on preventing dehydration in their elderly loved ones.

Elderly At Most Risk For Hyperthermia & Heat Related Illnesses: NYS Office Of Aging
People over 50 are at the greatest risk of suffering heat-related illnesses. Many people die of heat-related illnesses each year; most of these deaths can be prevented with advance preparation.

Keeping Cool in the Summer Heat: Guidelines for The Elderly : NYS Office Of Aging
With the hottest part of the summer approaching, the New York State Office for the Aging wants to encourage families of older adults to help protect seniors from the consequences heat can have on their health.

Memories, Meanings And Lessons For Life: Eileen McDargh
One woman's experience of the caregiving process and the important lessons she has learned.

I'll Never Forget What's His Name:Jillian Leslie, Everyday Warriors
How our perceptions of life change as we age..

If you are interested in submitting an article(s) please go to: Submit. You will find a form for submitting your article, bio/profile, copyright permissions, etc. Please review our guidelines for acceptance, submit and we will notify you upon acceptance.

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In Memory

Kay B aka ADA KAY posted at our message boards this month sharing about the passing of her mother. Kay left work over 4 years ago to care for her aging mother 24/7 and began attending the chats and participating in the community. Yet her passing in April was so devastating to her.. see her post: I know she is still having a difficult time adjusting from her post. For those of you who know her, you may want to email her at KAY.
I am keeping you in my thoughts and prayers for a gentle, easier healing Kay. You have always been an inspiration and loving force in the community. Richest blessings.

~

CAREGIVERS CONCERNS

Oh! My Aching Back

Caregivers and back injuries are no strangers. The pulling and tugging used to move a disabled loved one will take its toll. Statistically, a back injury can cost $10,000.00 before surgery or rehabilitation, and one-third of all employed persons will have a back-related injury in their lifetimes…and caregivers are no exception.

Here is a quick review of the structures of the back and their purposes: The spinal column provides support and flexibility for the head and trunk and protection for the spinal cord. It is made up of five different types of bony structures called vertebrae. Between each vertebra are cushions called discs that consist of a tough outer shell and a soft, jelly-like center. A "slipped disc" means the disc is being squeezed and impinging on the spinal cord or an exiting nerve. The spinal cord is about 18 inches long, ¼ inch thick, and has 31 pairs of nerves that exit from it. There are 400 muscles that stabilize the spine, maintain posture, and provide for ease in movement. 1000 tendons connect the muscles to bone. Ligaments, which connect bone to bone, keep the spine aligned to prevent injury with movement. Any one of these structures can suffer an injury, but muscle strain is the most common cause of back pain.

So how can you prevent back strain or injury when caring for your loved one? Start by maintaining good posture and using good body mechanics. Good posture prevents too much stress on any one area of the back and good body mechanics means using and moving your body parts in balance. Standing erect with your ears, shoulders, and hips in a straight line is the ideal posture. Good body mechanics consist of these basic principles: See your feet as the base and keep your center of gravity above them. Spread them apart to the width of your shoulders and balance your weight over this base. When lifting an object off the floor bend at the knees, keep your back straight, and hold the object close to your body. If pushing something heavy, keep your body straight, put one foot forward, and push your weight into the object. To move your loved one in bed use the same principle but put one foot back and gently pull her towards you shifting your weight back. Always use your abdominal muscles for strength, they act as an internal girdle. When assisting your loved one to stand, face her and establish a good base, bend at the knees, reach under her arms and place your hands on her upper back. Have her put her hands on your shoulders, not around your neck. Now gently rock back and forth and using the momentum lift on the count of three. Always use smooth rhythmic movements instead of jerking ones. If your loved one is bathed in bed, be sure she is close to the side you are standing to avoid over reaching. A hospital bed is ideal because its height can be adjusted to meet your needs.

Use common sense and never attempt to move someone heavy alone. If your loved one falls and can't get up, call the paramedics. They will come, help her up and assess for injuries.

It takes work to maintain a healthy back. Exercises such as gentle stretching, walking, abdominal muscle strengthening and even weight training are beneficial. A pain free healthy back is a blessing. If you ever suffered from a bad back you know what I mean.

Copyrighted 2003 by Mary C. Fridley RN, C

Mary C. Fridley RN, C is our featured Question & Answer columnist at Empowering Caregivers as well as a contributing editor. She is a Registered Nurse board certified in gerontology with more than twenty years of experience in the geriatric health field. She is a writer of advice columns and articles for caregivers as well as a public speaker. Write to Mary at: info@gero-resources.com and visit her site at: Gero-Resources.com

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IMPORTANT NEWS

Well Spouse Foundation Annual Conference
"Strengthening Ties and Making Connections,"
October 24 - 26, 2003
and
Respite Weekend-Newtown, Pa on September 12 - 14, 2003

The Well Spouse Foundation, an association of spousal caregivers - will hold their 15th annual conference, "Strengthening Ties and Making Connections," from October 24 - 26, 2003. The conference will be held at The Newport Harbor Hotel & Marina in Newport, Rhode Island. The foundationi s also sponsoring a respite weekend for interested parties living on the east coast, to be held from September 12 - 14, 2003 in Newtown,
Pennsylvania. Event details: www.wellspouse.org

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4th International Respite Conference
September 16-19, 2003

Online Registration:
Royal Pacific Resort, Universal Orlando, FL:

Family conference registration rates are available to additional family members accompanying fully registered family attendees staying at the Royal Pacific Resort. E-mail Maggie Edgar for details.

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NFCA Sponsors Caregiver Workshop:
September 25th & 26th San Francisco

A new workshop around family caregiving, sponsored by Last Acts Partner the National Family Caregivers Association (NFCA), will be held September 25 and 26, 2003, in San Francisco. The workshop, titled, ‘Communicating Effectively with Healthcare Professionals,’ empowers family caregivers to advocate more persuasively on behalf of their loved ones with the healthcare professionals providing treatment. It helps family caregivers function as true members of the healthcare team, assuring better continuity of care and better access to the resources needed by the care recipient. All materials needed to conduct the caregiver workshops, as well as on-going technical support, will be provided by NFCA. To learn more about this event and apply for attendance online, go to: nfcacares.org

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Living Well With Chronic Illness Act

Congressman James Oberstar (D-MN) has introduced the "Living Well with Fatal Chronic Illness Act of 2003" (HR 2883). It would establish a $3,000 refundable long-term care tax credit for caregivers of spouses, dependents, and certain other low income individuals, who have long-term care needs. The the credit may go to individuals in need of care or to their family caregivers.

The bill would also stimulate research, demonstration projects, and education within several U. S. Federal agencies. The Department of Health and Human Services (DHHS) would conduct reasearch on how to adjust both payment and regulations to assure good care with better quality standards. DHHS would be required to make annual reports to Congress on issues that affect quality of life for people with progressive fatal illness and their caregivers. Medicare Pilot Programs would be set up to test innovations in service delivery. The Health Resources and Services Administration would designate fatal chronic illnesses as a medically underserved population and would fund training for health professionals, including palliative care and hospice workers. Other Federal agencies such as the Agency for Healthcare Research and Quality, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, and the National Institutes of Health would also get new mandates to track and report on issues related to fatal chronic illness. The Dep

For more details on the bill, check this overview from Americans for Better Care of the Dying (ABCD), one of the nation's leading advocacy groups for improving quality of care at the end of life: ABCD-Caring.org

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New Program On Spiritual Care At The End Of Life
Sept 22nd In Phoenix, AZ.

A new program on spiritual care at the end of life will be held Monday, September 22, 2003, in Phoenix, AZ. The program is called, ‘Spiritual Care of Life's End: A Program for Clergy and Spiritual Leaders,’ and features Dr. Ira Byock, author of the renowned book ‘Dying Well.’ The event is co-sponsored by Last Acts Partner Hospice of the Valley as well as the Arizona Ecumenical Council. For more information about this event and to register, visit: hospiceofthevalley.org

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Caregivers Emerge As Vital Online Audience

A study from the Pew Internet & American Life Project reports that some six million home caregivers are now online. According to the study, Internet Health Resources, caregivers as a group are far more active than the general online population: 55% searched for information on prescription or over-the counter drugs (versus 34% of general users) and 62% sought information on a specific medical treatment or procedure (compared to 47% of general users). Full report is available in PDF format at PewInternet.org

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New Website For Older People & Caregivers For Health Info HealthCompass.org

The American Federation for Aging Research and the Merck Institute of Aging & Health have developed a terrific new website for older people and their caregivers seeking health information. Called Health Compass, at healthcompass.org, it provides three easy-to-use curricula on 1) searching the Web for health information; 2) evaluating the health information you find; and 3) making informed healthcare decisions. This last section also includes suggestions on how to improve communications with your physician.

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New Drug for Treating Alzheimer's Disease Shows Promise

Researchers report in the New England Journal of Medicine that a drug called memantine that was tested among patients with moderate-to-severe Alzheimer's disease has shown success in slowing mental deterioration. The drug also appeared to have few side effects. The Food and Drug Administration is now evaluating the drug for use in the United States. Drugs that can slow the deterioration that accompanies this disease will not only help patients but can substantially ease the burdens of care givers as well.To read more

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Aging Is Not Equal To Loss of Mental Functioning

Many people fear the loss of mental functioning, such as severe loss of memory, more than they fear death. But there is good news in a New York Times report of a recent Mayo Clinic study. The study examined mental functioning among people 90 to 99 years old. Researchers found that over half of the people in the study had good mental functioning, and about 12%, although they had significant memory problems, were still able to live independently and manage daily activities on their own. The researchers also noted the increased efforts to find drugs to slow mental impairment (see prior article in this E-News). Dr. John C. Morris, a neurologist at Washington University in St. Louis is quoted as saying that "M.C.I. (mild cognitive impairment) should not be accepted as a normal part of aging. It should be seen as a warning signal indicating that it's time to go get evaluated." To read more for to NY Times

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Important New Resource for Managing Medications

Managing medications can be an enormous challenge for many older people. As we age we may be taking an increasing number of medications and supplements -- prescribed, over the counter and even herbal remedies -- to manage various diseases and symptoms. This mix of more drugs can have unintended consequences and requires careful attention and management.

Help for consumers in understanding and managing their medications is available through a newly released education module in the "Live Well, Live Long: Steps to Better Health" program created by the American Society on Aging (ASA) in collaboration with the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC). Some of the information (particularly in the section called phase 2) that describes types of medication problems, their consequences and other medication related issues, can be directly helpful to consumers. Other parts of the module are designed to help educators educate the community and professionals about the importance of proper medication management.This valuable resource, along with other helpful resources from the ASA, can be found at ASA

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Bush Administration Plans To Cut Medicare Payments To
Physicians by 4.2% Next Year

Bush administration officials announced on Aug. 11 that they expect to cut Medicare payments to doctors by 4.2% at the beginning of 2004, unless Congress passes legislation that would reduce or eliminate the cut, the New York Times reports. In a proposed rule that will be published Aug. 15, administration officials say that the cut is required by law. The administration rule also would give doctors a "slightly higher" allowance for malpractice insurance costs because of "sharp increases" in providers' medical malpractice premiums, the Times reports. More info at : Kaisernetwork.org

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800 New Meds Under Study Offer Hope
For Ill Seniors And Caregivers

Here’s some optimistic news for seniors and their caregivers.

I’m pasting below a release about some 800 medicines now in development for various diseases possibly associated with aging. For more information on new medicines being tested, you can go to a free website at phrma.org.

And don’t forget indigent seniors may well qualify for free drugs from manufacturer patient assistance programs. You can go to another free website, helpingpatients.org, for this information. Jeff Trewhitt (202) 835-3464

A new survey by the Pharmaceutical Research and Manufacturers of America (PhRMA) found that drug companies are testing more than 800 potential medicines for diseases of aging, including 123 for heart disease and stroke, 395 for cancer and 309 for such debilitating diseases as Alzheimer’s, diabetes, and osteoporosis. All of the medicines are either in human clinical trials or awaiting approval by the Food and Drug Administration. To read more go to: HOPE

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Spanish Language Version
Consumer/Family Resources
End-of-Life Care

This is the Spanish language version of the popular Last Acts Family Committee product (described fully below). Like its English counterpart, the Spanish Compendium contains information about caregiver resources from numerous organizations, including books, videos, Web sites and brochures. Each entry includes the resource title, producing organization, and information about how to order that particular item. To order a copy of the Spanish compendium, please send an email to lastacts@aol.com. Include your mailing information in the body of the email and "Spanish Compendium" in the subject line. To view a PDF version of this document, click here.

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Conversations Before the Crisis

Discussion about end-of-life wishes are among the most difficult conversations to have, especially when everyone is healthy and death seems so far off. But an unexpected illness or injury can send a family into a tailspin, so it is important to talk about end-of-life wishes before an emergency situation forces you to do so. The Last Acts Family Committee has developed a new resource guide, Conversations before the Crisis. This booklet offers the reader conversation "triggers," such as using television programs and family gatherings to start talking, and includes sample language as guidance. This booklet is intended for use by both the elderly and children of the aging, and it includes a resources listing with helpful books and Web sites. To view this document online (in PDF format), click here.

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Last Acts
Family Committee Consumer/Family Resources
End-of-Life Care

This guide contains information from numerous organizations offering a variety of caregiver resources including books, videos, web sites and brochures. Each entry includes the resource title, producing organization, and information about how to order that particular item. To view the updated Last Acts Family Committee Consumer/Family Resources for End-of-Life Care, click here.

Adult Child-Caregiver Project at NYU ADRC

In the end of September, New York University School of Medicines's Silberstein Institute for Aging and Dementia will be initiating a two year program for family caregivers to participate in and individual participation requires a small time commitment. Participants will be provided with education and support to decrease negative caregiving effects for example: depression, increase positive caregiving effects such as: improving the quality of the caregiver/parent interaction, and developing a more favorable balance among life’s competing responsibilities. Sessions will occur during lunch or evenings at NYU with a light meal. There is no cost for participation.

Contact: Olanta Barton at: 550 First Avenue, THN 314, New York, NY 10016, Phone: (212) 263-5710; voicemail (212) 263-2619 Fax: (212) 263-6991 or email Olanta. N. Barton

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AOA- Administration On Aging
"Take A Loved One to the Doctor" Day September 16, 2003.

The U.S. Administration on Aging (AoA) has joined forces with the National Caucus and Center on Black Aged (NCBA) and the National Council on Patient Information and Education (NCPIE) to celebrate "Take Your Loved One to the Doctor" day, September 16, 2003. The event is part of a U.S. Department of Health and Human Services campaign, "Closing the Health Gap 2003." Event information:

Research On Web Based Learning For Chronic Illness~

People with heart disease, lung disease or type II diabetes are invited to take part in a six-week online workshop sponsored by the Stanford School of Medicine. The interactive workshops are offered free of charge as part of a study of the effectiveness of Web-based learning in helping people acquire the skills needed to manage their chronic health conditions. Enrollment is nearing the maximum, so interested individuals are encouraged to sign up without delay. For more information or to register, visit healthyliving.stanford.edu.

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“Palliative Care: Complete Care Everyone Deserves,”

A free 16-page booklet, “Palliative Care: Complete Care Everyone Deserves,” is available from the National Alliance for Caregiving (NAC) and New York City-based Friends and Relatives of Institutionalized Aged (FRIA). To request a copy, send an e-mail to info@caregiving.org or go to http://www.caregiving.org/care.pdf.

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Shortage Of Geriatricians

Most senior citizens can see a family physician for the majority of their medical problems, but as they get older and sicker, their complex medical conditions often require the specialty of a geriatrician. That is, if they are able to find one. Currently, there are about 9,000 geriatricians in the United States, but the number is declining. The geriatrics society estimates 36,000 will be needed by 2030. Geriatricians specialize in medical problems associated with aging. They have several years of additional training in areas such as neurology, psychiatry and urology so they can recognize problems other doctors may consider normal aging. globalaging.org

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Senate Committee On Aging Looks At Senior Depression

The Senate Special Committee on Aging held a hearing on 7/28 focusing on senior depression and life-saving mental health treatments for older Americans. The hearing addressed the issue that, among the elderly, depression can be mistaken for physical illness because the symptoms are thought to be age-related. Data addressed as part of the hearing suggest that while older Americans constitute 13 percent of the national population, they commit 18 percent of the suicides. Panelists also addressed the issue that men are four times as likely to commit suicide as women. The hearing reviewed studies that assert 70 percent of elderly suicide victims met with their doctors within one month of their suicide and were not treated or referred to treatment for depression. Additional information on the hearing is available on the SpecialCommittee on Aging’s Web site..

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INFORMATIVE CAREGIVING ARTICLES & INSPIRATION

Quotes

If you just start dancing, I can assure you, by the powers vested in me (more than you could ever imagine), the music will be added - as will the partners, the giant disco ball, and whatever else you like).

But I must warn you, "start", is not to be confused with "start, and then stop to see if anything happened". Nope, that's "I'm scared, tired, and not sure what I really want." I mean "start", as in "never stop, never look back, because even if I've made a "mistake", at least, I still get to dance."

You do your thing, and I'll do mine,

The Universe

The secret of health for both mind and body is not to mourn for the past, worry about the future, or anticipate troubles, but to live in the present moment wisely and earnestly.

Buddha

Friends are the ones who know the song in your heart and can sing it back to you when you have forgotten the words."

Anonymous

Life Is What Happens While You’re Making Other Plans

John Lennon
~
Putting it all in focus on Monday

The most destructive habit..............................Worry
The greatest Joy................................................Giving
The greatest loss..........................Loss of self-respect
The most satisfying work.................Helping others
The ugliest personality trait.......................Selfishness
The most endangered species......Dedicated leaders
Our greatest natural resource......................Our youth
The greatest "shot in the arm"...Encouragement
The greatest problem to overcome.......................Fear
The most effective sleeping pill..........Peace of mind
The most crippling failure disease............Excuses
The most powerful force in life.............................Love
The most dangerous pariah........................A gossiper
The world's most incredible computer.........The brain
The worst thing to be without.............................. Hope
The deadliest weapon................................The tongue
The two most power-filled words......................"I Can"
The greatest asset...........................................Faith
The most worthless emotion...........................Self-pity
The most beautiful attire....................................SMILE!
The most prized possession..........................Integrity
The most important thing in life...........................GOD

Author Unknown
Submitted by Eleanor G.
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MESSAGE BOARDS & EMAIL BAG

On your web site you state that there should be more legislation to help grandparents that are taking care of their grandchildren. There is already everything available from foster care payments to food stamps to SSI. How much help do you think they need?
Instead of legislating more help what we need is for people that can't take care of their children to stop having them. John Robert

Hello John,
I don't usually respond to the emails but this is what came to mind for me.These thoughts have run through my mind as well, but there are thousands of grandparents and then some who are caring for their grandchildren because of tragedies vs. enabling their children and the need is extremely great. We all need to be less judgmental. We are all in this world together, and if we are caregivers in any way, we all need some types of assistance. GRM

~

I haven't introduced myself as it seems that putting everything down in words will be too hard to do. My name is Dawn and I am 22 years old. I am currently taking care of my dad (in my home) who is dying from Hep. C

My life has not been the same since December when my first child died during pregnancy. ( I only mention this because I was not "ready" to face another huge life challange. Then my dad got really ill in May. I took care of him for 5 weeks in his home, then he went into a nursing home during the summer, and now he is in my home. I feel like I have lost my identity in all of this. I used to be a student, an intern, have a job, and be a mom. Now I am a little bit of everything but nothing at all. Does that make sense? I dread the question "what do you do?"

I have done very little for myself lately. I signed up for a swimming class once a week that starts in Sept. But I want so bad to get a job or volunteer...to do anything for myself. To be around people again besides my husband and dad. I feel like I need an escape from all of the emotional requirments on me...knowing full well that I can't escape it but only take a short break. Something to recharge my batteries...for myself.

Am I crazy for even concidering it? How can I make a commitment when I know my dad is only getting worse? How am I to take care of myself in all of this? Dawn

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JOKES & HUMOR

Have You Ever Wondered...

  • Have you ever wondered..Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?
  • Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?
  • Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?
  • Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?
  • Why is it that to stop Windows XP you have to click on "Start"?
  • Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with
  • real lemons?
  • Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
  • Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
  • Why isn't there mouse-flavoured cat food?
  • When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it?
  • Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?
  • Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
  • You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes?
  • Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?
  • Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
  • Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?
  • If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?
  • If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?

True Author Unknown

These are one of those emails that goes round and round on the Internet. I searched for an author but was unsuccessful.. it appeared on thousands of sites... so my apologies go out to the original author and hope it brought you a smile.

"Down in Florida Waters..."

While sports fishing off the Florida coast, a tourist capsized his boat. He could swim, but his fear of alligators kept him clinging to the overturned craft.

Spotting an old beachcomber standing on the shore, the tourist shouted, " Are there any gators around here?!"

"Naw," the man hollered back, "they ain't been around for years!"

Feeling safe, the tourist started swimming leisurely toward the shore.

About halfway there he asked the guy, "How'd you get rid of the gators?"

"We didn't do nothin,'" the beachcomber said.

"Wow," said the breathless still-swimming tourist and slowed down.

The beachcomber then added, "The sharks got 'em."

Choices ~ Healing ~ Love
September 1, 2003 VOLUME 4 ISSUE #12
Publisher & Editor: GAIL R. MITCHELL-

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