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What Type Of Relationship Do You Have With The Loved One You Care For

Most of you have been Caregiving for a while. For those of you who have just begun, use this exercise to follow along with so that when you come across issues that apply to you, you will have some additional tools to assist you.

Family Caregivers around the world are caring for parents, spouses, children, relatives and friends. The needs of the carerecipient as well as those of the caregiver undergo tremendous transformations during the various stages that occur. If you are a child, there are many who would say that you learn incredible lessons from them. I agree. If their illness was sustained from birth, there are many growth periods which present themselves that they must adapt to from infancy, to preschool, and so on.

The range of stages is perhaps greatest in the younger years of a life span. The socialization process, friendships, are so critical at this time as well.

In caring for a spouse, the situations that may arise which are challenged are those of intimacy, financial stability, your sexual relationship, role changing and much more.

In caring for a parent, role reversals are the predominant issue. Many of you want to still be the little child being nurtured and all of a sudden you are thrust in the role of parenting for your parent. A host of emotions can rise from guilt, resentment, helplessness and many more.

The exercise for this week is to quiet yourself in your own energy. When you have reached a peaceful state through deep breathing as we have done in the past, allow yourself to merely become the observer. Allow your mind to go through many of the experiences you have encountered with your loved one. Feel all the emotions, the confusion, the worry, the doubt, the fears and the love. Let them pass through your mind's eye as if they were a movie. Observe the shifts that have taken place in your loved one. Pay attention to as much detail as you can. Then become aware of the changes and the adjustments you have had to make. See where you have more work to do. What is it that you would like to manifest in the relationship as you continue along?

When you are finished, quietly write all your thought and experiences. Do this exercise at least twice. Notice changes in your observation from one writing to another. Be gentle and nurturing to yourself.

Blessings to you

©COPYRIGHT GAIL R. MITCHELL 10/27/99  


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