As caregivers, it is sometimes very difficult to open up and share your fears and emotions that you are holding in as well as on to. This is one of the unhealthiest things you can do for yourself. Perhaps you were brought up to think that crying or sharing these issues or getting professional help for your emotional state is a definite no, that it is an indication that you are weak and not capable of functioning.
Many of your parents were from the depression generation. Seeking counseling was not a choice as in their minds by going for help it was if they were admitting that they were really very messed up emotionally. Their beliefs became totally embedded within your own belief system. There are myriad of other reasons which may hold you back as well: by seeking help you are weak, by seeking help you are revealing deep dark secrets of personal family members that should not be shared with strangers, the possibility that you are holding in such anger and resentment that you may have negative thoughts or wishes as to how you might resolve the situation at hand and much more.
If you can relate to anything I am saying, it is important for you to reevaluate your current emotional state and see if you can begin making some changes that will benefit you in your life. Holding these fears and emotions in usually can and will lead to illnesses or symptoms manifesting within your own physical and emotional bodies. This is also a known fact. Another important thought to remember is that if you are living in fear or reliving emotional hurts from the past you are not living in the present. In holding on to past emotions you are living in the past which is no longer. It is gone. If you are living in fear, you are living in the future. To live life fully you must be fully present in each moment.
With the rise of use in the Internet, it can actually ease your burden in opening up and sharing because of the anonymity that it provides. You may change your screename so others do not know who you are and you can begin to open up and post on message boards, in newsletters, chats and much more, revealing issues which are really troubling you and holding you back from healing and living a fuller life in the moment.
Take time to meditate on these issues which you may be holding. Sit quietly and close your eyes, breathing in love and light and good thoughts. On each exhale let go of all the worries, the doubts, the fears, the concerns and beliefs that occupy your mind in the moment. Do this for several minutes until you are feeling freer and lighter, allowing yourself to lift gently as a feather floating in a gentle breeze. Begin to envision what it is that is troubling you; by observing yourself as an outsider might witness you. Allow your mind and thoughts to follow through with this process, staying focused, feeling all that you are feeling. When you feel yourself calm, with new visions revealed, allow yourself to come back gently onto the physical plane and write as much as you can about your experiences. Work on doing this exercise two to three times this week. Blessings to you.
COPYRIGHTED GAIL R. MITCHELL 12/20/1999
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