Empowering Caregivers-John Fellito - Another Tool For Your Toolbag

It is the meaning we assign to events and to people we encounter that affects us for good or ill, not the events or people themselves. - Hendrie Weisinger, Ph.D.

Here ís a mental model through which you may flow your houghts, concerns, problems or creative ideas. I am pleased to report very favorable feedback in the results my clients and friends have enjoyed from itís use.

The Five A's Modell

Awareness
Acceptance
Attention
Action (m)
Action (p)

When you have a problem, challenge or project try this model on for size. Stop whatever you may be doing, close your eyes, get quiet and present your thoughts to yourself.

Awareness: Simply become aware of what's on your mind regarding this specific situation.

Acceptance: Accept the situation as it is. Understand that things are as they are and there is no use in fighting it.

Allow yourself to fully feel whatever emotions are coming up for you. It makes no sense to push your feelings aside.

In doing so this unexpressed emotion will only find another place to express itself. For some, it may be tightness in the back, shoulders, stomach etc. For others it may be a headache, tiredness or restlessness. Whatever the reactions may be, you will find that a rapid way of turning yourself around is to give yourself the permission to fully feel how you are feeling without judgment. Get to this place of pure being and allow yourself to feel. We were given a wide range of emotions for a reason and they are meant to be expressed.

Attention: Now you can give attention to the situation with less negative charge. Try to assume the witness position. Review the circumstance as a disinterested party. This dynamic will help you gain greater understanding and insight. Once youíve made a thorough study of the situation move to ...

Action (mental): Now begin to image the situation as you would ideally desire it to be. Use all of your senses. Feel the emotions you would feel if the situation was just as you desire it to be. Do this in a present moment context ie., pray as though youíve already received. Connect with these delicious and delightful emotions with the same intensity as you did in the acceptance phase of this model. Make it real and vivid and see all those involved as winners benefiting from this ideal image to which you are giving birth.

Action (physical): What action steps can you take to materialize that which youíve created subjectively? Take some physical action as quickly as possible and youíll begin to discover your own awesome power. And feel really great too!